"It's about henriki, here's the thing. You guys have been struggling with this for so long for so many years," he says. "There's going to be a part of you that says, even though your life is shidty right now, at least you can survive." He adds: "I've had literal flashbacks before when i've like abstained... And it feels like a like on its dying breath, it's desperately trying to put up one last fight"