Shame as a Driver of Overachievement

Emotional repression is often invisible to high performers, and it can be one of the biggest barriers to sustainable success. In this episode of Trauma Rewired, we explore how trauma-shaped survival responses like fight, flight, freeze, and fawn can create patterns of overwork, perfectionism, and emotional disconnection.

You’ll learn how subconscious repression differs from conscious suppression, how shame and perfectionism drive overachievement, and why even big business milestones can feel hollow when your nervous system isn’t safe enough to process emotions.

Our guest, Margy Feldhuhn, shares her journey from multi–seven-figure business growth fueled by survival patterns to building capacity for joy, presence, and connection through Neurosomatic Intelligence (NSI) tools and regular emotional processing.

We break down the health risks, relational costs, and business consequences of chronic repression and give you strategies to expand your emotional capacity so you can actually enjoy the success you’ve built.

00:00 – Why Anger Matters and the Cost of Suppression 04:06 – Honoring Anger and Boundaries 06:06 – How Chronic Fight Shows Up in Life 09:45 – Early Conditioning and Nervous System Patterns 13:00 – Trauma, Parentification, and the Fight Response 15:43 – Impact on Relationships and Work 21:21 – The Neuroscience of the Fight Response 31:41 – Physical and Health Effects of Chronic Fight 39:28 – Anger vs. Chronic Fight: Key Differences 42:09 – Processing Anger Safely 49:36 – Boundaries, Regulation, and Aligned Action 53:38 – Final Takeaway: Fight as Pattern, Anger as Compass

Topics Discussed in This Episode:

• How trauma survival responses show up in high performers

• The difference between suppression and repression

• The role of shame and perfectionism in overachievement

• Why business milestones can feel empty

• How repression impacts health, relationships, and leadership capacity

• Emotional hygiene for sustainable success

• Recognizing survival patterns in entrepreneurial decision-making

• Building nervous system capacity to enjoy success

• The ripple effect of emotional processing in business and life

• Practical tools to move from repression to authentic presence

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