Is There a White Rhino in Vietnam?

There's almost no way Ken and I are going to be able to afford the white rhino that we hope to keep here as a pet in the bunker. Maybe what we should do is collect hair from barbershop floors, press it into rhino-shaped horns, and then sell them on the black market in Vietnam. Do we tell people it's not rhino horn? We don't have it. The funny thing is it's just keratin. There's nothing magical.