
With Neil Strauss & Esther Perel at The Strand in NYC
Tangentially Speaking with Christopher Ryan
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I Want to Be Intimate, but Don't Tell Me Anything That Makes Me Uncomfortable
There's a word in the book called pathological accommodation, where you're just sacrificing your needs for somebody else's and it leads to resentment. A lot of people, I find that don't even give the part of the choice. They assume it's going to hurt them and then they don't even discuss it. Then you say, look, this is inviting lies. This is when the lighter lying invitee on day one. It's really inviting someone. Why does it mean? I want to be close to you but don't tell me anything that makes me uncomfortable. What exactly are we saying? You come with words and all, and you come with questions,. And you come with tensions
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