When his ships arrived in Barbados, no one needed a device to make their bed warmer. Now, on the other hand, a cooling pan would have been way more successful. But this is an age before electricity. So it's not exactly something that would work. Also, I don't melt. They'll have a soggy mattress. And then he gets into floorboards and then you're going to rot.
It is perhaps the wildest story yet. The story of a man who did everything wrong but somehow came out even better every time
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