Lindsey: I think sometimes we try to like analyze how it happens from this kind of fear-based space. We're like well maybe I should admit this maybe if I weighed five pounds less and then ultimately that's just the way to keep punching ourselves in the gut, she says. Lindsey: Pain is pain it's not comparable your pain gets to be real and valid and you are totally worth finding and creating your own healing too. "I'm ready to hear it because I know how to take care of myself either way" was her message for women going through a divorce.