I Was Abused by a Man, and I Didn't Even Have the Language to Say That

i was abused by a man, and didn't even have the language to say that. Growing up as someone in the conservative, theologically conservative side of the church,. ma was li wallan, damned to hell like that'. My life. And i i also realized like, i can't trust men because i had this difficult relationship with my dad - at least on my side of things. I think mhy dad wold be pretty unaware that i felt that way. He would have made an effort to fix things if he knew, but he didn't know. It did make things more difficult for me when going, ok, am i ever like, is being with man ever going to