Hype: self-regulation and self-compassion

If you've ever had a week where your intentions were solid… and your follow-through vanished into the void, you're not alone. In this episode, Eric is joined by writer, teacher, and ADHD coach Paulette Perhach, who shares the FINISH framework: a simple, ADHD-friendly approach to actually completing projects, building consistency, and getting unstuck. Paulette's take is refreshingly honest: ADHD can feel like the superpower and the kryptonite at the same time. She talks about getting diagnosed at 38, learning to ask for accommodations without shame, and building systems that support creative work… even when your brain fights you every step of the way. This conversation is part practical strategy, part nervous-system-friendly encouragement, and very "you're not broken, you're under-supported." ✅ In This Episode, You'll Learn: Why ADHD brains often need "fake stakes" (engineered urgency) to follow through How to break big goals into small increments that create momentum The importance of nixing distractions (without relying on willpower) How to protect hyperfocus and use it intentionally instead of accidentally Why community and body doubling are so powerful for ADHD How self-compassion becomes a real strategy, not just a nice idea What to do when you're having a "bad brain day" and can't access your usual tools 🧠 The FINISH Framework (Six Elements to Finish Anything) Paulette breaks down the acronym FINISH: F — Fake Stakes ADHD motivation often needs emotional urgency. Fake stakes are "real enough" accountability: deadlines, commitments, public accountability, or putting something on the calendar that makes it harder to ghost your own goal. I — Increment Instead of "write the book," aim for 500 words a day. Small daily targets create dopamine, progress, and trust. N — Nix Distractions This is about designing your environment so you don't have to wrestle your brain all day long. Tools like app blockers (Freedom App) and external reminders can support focus. I — Immerse Make space to hyperfocus on purpose by doing the planning/admin work ahead of time. Paulette calls this a weekly "writer's refresh" to calm the nervous system and reduce background stress. S — Share Community matters. Body doubling matters. Doing things with other people (even silently) can dramatically increase follow-through. H — Hype This one is about self-talk and emotional regulation. Exercise, meditation, and kindness toward yourself aren't luxuries, they're performance tools for ADHD brains. 🔥 Standout Moments Paulette's line: "My version of consistency is that I get back up every time I fall down." The difference between luxury vs. accommodation, especially when traveling Eric's take on requesting extra time to board flights and why it can be a legitimate accommodation The idea that shame doesn't create change (it creates shutdown) Why ADHD-friendly success often looks like iteration, not perfection 🎧 ADHD-Friendly Takeaway If your brain only gives you one usable step today, let it be this: Pick the smallest thread you can hang onto to stay connected to the work. Open the document. Read one paragraph. Write one sentence. Show up for one increment. That counts. That builds trust. 👤 About Paulette Perhach Paulette Perhach is a writer, teacher, and ADHD coach who helps writers and creatives build sustainable, fulfilling creative lives. Her work has appeared in major outlets, and she leads writing and meditation sessions through her community programs. 🔗 Resources Mentioned Paulette Perhach (website): paulperhach.com Writer's Mission Control Center: thewritermissioncontrolcenter.com Freedom App (distraction blocking) ✅ Work With Eric / Join the Community Want structure that actually works for your ADHD brain? ADHD reWired Coaching & Accountability Groups: coachingrewired.com Winter 2026 Groups Forming Now! -- February 5-6 | April 2-3Registration EventsThursday, January 15, 22, 29 at 4:30 PM PT / 7:30 PM ETFriday, January 16, 23, 30 at 7:30 AM PT / 11:30 AM ET Adult Study Hall (Virtual Coworking): adultstudyhall.com Support the podcast on Patreon: patreon.com/adhdrewired