When people experience strong negative emotions, they're intensely motivated to share them with other people. Research suggests that venting our feelings often backfires and makes us feel worse. The best kinds of conversations when someone approaches you for help with their chatter are conversations that actually do two things: First, you learn about the other person's experience. And it's doing both of those things that we find in research is useful for not only getting people to connect well, but also helping them work through their experiences.

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