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Sex is such a big part of being human. It's how our species persists. But it's also so more than that. Getting past that hump, pun fully intended, and talking openly about sex can give you access to more confidence and joy in your sex life. There are a lot of cultural scrips around how we're supposed to behave when it comes to sex. For me, as a heterosexual, sis gendered man, i'm supposed to want sex, non stop and only sex, no talking, no feelings. And i feel self aware enough now to say that that is actually not a good description of how i feel about sex or what i want.

Sex is such a big part of being human. It's how our species persists, but it's also so much more than that. So why do we feel so uncomfortable talking about it? Emily Nagoski is a sex educator who argues that learning how to talk openly about sex — and unlearning some damaging misconceptions— can give you access to a more authentic and fulfilling sex life. She has a Ph.D. in health behavior, clinical internship experience at the Kinsey Institue, and is the author of the best-selling book “Come as You Are: The Surprising New Science that Will Transform Your Sex Life.” To learn more about "How to Be a Better Human," host Chris Duffy, or find footnotes and additional resources, please visit: go.ted.com/betterhuman