"It's scary speaking this to the world. I because who knows, in a week, if my buddy's i'm talking about watch this, and i free any other like, why don't you talk to me?" "I look at myself in the mirror, i'll be like, seeing someone, els like, look at me," he says of his self-loathing. 'i get the sense that when i do, like, i'll just,. i'll just free fall, and i'll fall through the air, and then, like, my life is out of my hands'