Is Triangulation Problematic?

2min Snip

00:00

Play full episode

Summary

Transcript

Episode notes

There is not what's called triangulation. One parent really bonds with the child against the other parent, and that can then create cycles in which the permissive parent becomes more of the authority figure. Triangulation is problematic. The last one is family secrets. It goes to what you said about authenticity, you know, where you just don't tell the kid that they were adopted. When you figure you'll let them in on it when they turn 18, but it's just something in the air. That's problematic.

Dr. Rick and Forrest open up the mailbag and answer questions from listeners related to how we can build better relationships (particularly with our families) and deal with difficult people. They explore the common traits of happy families, how to deal with people who weaponize psychological jargon, navigating different perceptions of “what happened,” and repairing a damaged relationship with a child. Forrest ends the conversation by talking about the importance of “going to zero” after a breach of trust.

Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube.

New Online Course From Dr. Rick: Learn the tools you need to build strong, healthy, fulfilling relationships of all kinds in Rick's new Strong Heart Relationship Series. The program begins on February 18th, and all the teaching is recorded so you can watch on your own schedule. Visit RickHanson.net/strongheart to learn more and get 20% with coupon code BeingWell20.

Key Topics:

0:00: Introduction

1:00: Question 1: Common characteristics of happy families

8:25: Differentiation and integration

10:55: Symptoms of a less healthy family system

12:15: The role of love

19:55: Question 2: What to do when people use psychological jargon during a conflict

26:00: Defending yourself effectively, and staying on topic

30:50: Question 3: Navigating different perceptions of a difficult event

35:45: Question 4: Healing a strained relationship with a child (or parent)

39:45: Functional repair before emotional vulnerability

46:45: “Going to zero” with behavior when repair is needed

56:10: Recap

Support the Podcast: We're now on Patreon! If you'd like to support the podcast, follow this link.

Sponsors:

This podcast is sponsored by BetterHelp, and you can join over a million people using the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!

Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription.

Connect with the show:

Subscribe on iTunes

Follow Forrest on YouTube

Follow Forrest on Instagram

Follow Rick on Facebook

Follow Forrest on Facebook

Visit Forrest's website

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices