Sally Kohn: I know many people who struggle with getting themselves to do the things that they want to do. She says there's a tendency called an upholder, where you meet outer and inner expectations. An obliger is someone who doesn't make time for herself but makes time for others. Kohn: If you're one of them, it's not that you are lazy or don't have willpower. You just need to figure out how to crack the code on being an obliger.

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