How to Be Whole in a Relationship?

i think both of us probably had a ton of shame, and we were trying to like, fill the holes ind our like, brokenness with each other. And i don't think i've ever been able to achieve this quality of love if i didn't know that there is nothing wrong with me,. He doesn't complete me. I am whole, he is whole, and we are just choosing to love each other. This gives me such a profound peace of mind, because i had a marriage before when that wasn't the case. It's possible to get like 98 % free from shame and to live in a place that is really genuinely, deeply and sustainably shamefree, right?