Choosing Battles in a High Conflict Divorce

Navigating High Conflict Divorce and Co-Parenting

In this episode of It's All Your Fault, hosts Megan Hunter and Bill Eddy answer listener questions to provide guidance on high conflict divorce and co-parenting dilemmas.

Ending a Divorce Dispute with a Self-Unaware Ex

The first response is to a listener asking how to finalize a divorce when a spouse lacks self-awareness. Bill explains not to expect insight from highly manipulative people. He advises weighing options and setting limits versus seeking concessions.

Making Mediation Work with a High-Conflict Ex

Next, they tackle a question about mediating with an inflexible ex-spouse. Bill recommends one or two sessions maximum before assessing if it's futile. Megan underscores making self-directed choices to end unproductive mediation.

Coping with Extreme Parental Alienation

Finally, they discuss dealing with an ex-spouse severely alienating children after divorce. Bill outlines common alienating behaviors and options like counseling or temporary custody change. Megan emphasizes understanding personalities aids strategic response.

Key Takeaways:

• Don’t expect self-awareness from high-conflict people
• Choose your battles wisely when negotiating with exes
• Set firm limits on fruitless mediation efforts
• Recognize and address alienating behaviors proactively
• Personality insights assist responding strategically

Bill and Megan share hard-won experience navigating the rollercoaster of high-conflict divorce and co-parenting.

Links & Other Notes:

• COURSES
  • Erasing Family Documentary with Resist/Refuse Commentary from Bill Eddy, LCSW, Esq.
  • Resistance, Refusal and the Child’s Brain
  • New Ways for Families (course for parents in divorce/separation/co-parenting)
• BOOKS
  • Don’t Alienate the Kids: Raising Resilient Children While Avoiding High-Conflict Divorce
  • New Ways for Families: Professional Guidebook
  • New Ways for Families: Parent Workbook
  • High-Conflict Co-Parenting Survival Guide
  • Splitting: Protecting Yourself While Divorcing Someone with Borderline or Narcissistic Personality Disorder
• VIDEOS
  • The Primitive Emotional Power of Alienation
  • Alienation is Not Normal
  • Overcoming the Contagious Emotions of Alienation
• Our website: https://www.highconflictinstitute.com/
• Submit a Question for Bill and Megan
• All of our books can be found in our online store or anywhere books are sold, including as e-books.
• You can also find these show notes at our site as well.

Note: We are not diagnosing anyone in our discussions, merely discussing patterns of behavior.

• (00:00) - Welcome to It's All Your Fault
• (00:35) - High Conflict Divorce, Child Custody Battles, and Parental Alienation
• (01:18) - Divorce with an HCP
• (08:31) - Mediation in a High Conflict Divorce
• (13:44) - Parental Alienation
• (24:07) - Reminders & Coming Next Week: Anti-Social Personality Disorder

Learn more about our New Ways for Mediation Coaching Sessions. Get started today!