How to Deal With a Breakdown of a Relationship

We are stopping each other from living up to our own values and aligning with people in situations that are more befitting of us. Paula needs to step right back and have an honest conversation with herself what beliefs did she have during her marriage that still exist now or that have certainly been activated by having been in this recent involvement these beliefs are they factually true? Love yourself first where does the guilt come from as well because you know is a person a bad person for continuing them for not continuing in a marriage that's not working are you a bad person  four years down the road from divorce the message is coming out loud and clear love yourself first.