Is This an Abusive Relationship?

i thought we were a match made in heaven. We got married very quickly, sas a kind of whirlwind. It was so painful that even i couldn't rationalize it any more. So the more i allowed myself to lean into my inner voice, she started teaching me about the truth of that relationship. He had a very amanic and temper riddled personality. And because i am a naturally calm and patient person, we thought, well, that makes me perfectly suited for him. he would be the fire, i would beat the water.