Understanding the Pain of a Breakup: Emotional and Neurochemical Explanations

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This chapter explores the reason why breakups can be so painful and the science behind why we experience sadness, anxiety, and physical symptoms after a relationship ends. It discusses the release of neurochemicals in the brain associated with pleasure, bonding, and addiction, as well as the similarities between cravings for an ex partner and substance cravings. The chapter also touches upon the stages of grief model and the intensity of grief after a breakup.

It’s something we all inevitably experience in our dating lives, the pain of a break-up, saying goodbye to someone we loved and then, one day, the realisation that your ex has moved on and is with someone new. It can be incredibly confronting and painful, so today we're going to explore exactly why it hurts, even if deep down, we know we were never going to work. We will dive into the psychological ideas and theories behind rosy retrospection, social comparison, our self worth and the emotional and psychological closure that occurs when our ex moves on. We also examine the role of the rebound and why it’s important to take time to heal before getting into a new relationship, as explained by the addiction model of heartbreak and stages of grief. But finally, what next? Now that the chapter has finally closed, how do we move on and heal in a healthy manner and ignore those lingering self doubts that everything we had with our ex, they're now having with someone. All that and more in this episode, listen now!

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