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How to Become Securely Attached
Being Well with Forrest Hanson and Dr. Rick Hanson
The Four Stages of Growth
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We're designed to learn, especially in childhood from relational experiences that are negative. In the beginning, we're just doing our avoidant or anxious way of relating to others. And then we learn about it and we want to stop it, but we can't. It's our habit. We acquired it. The third stage of growth is unconscious competence; you understand your tendencies more than before. That's the fourth stage, unconscious competence, where you've just moved on. You know, it's no longer the habit of your heart. You've just really moved on.
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