Forgiveness and Family Bonds

Welcome to episode 51 of The Way Out Is In: The Zen Art of Living, a podcast series mirroring Zen Master Thich Nhat Hanh’s deep teachings of Buddhist philosophy: a simple yet profound methodology for dealing with our suffering, and for creating more happiness and joy in our lives.

In the spirit of Plum Village and its Zen tradition of public question-and-answer sessions, this is the second time that Zen Buddhist monk Brother Phap Huu and leadership coach and journalist Jo Confino have responded to listeners’ questions. We hope that the answers will help show how the teachings can help people who are in distress or are dealing with critical issues – but also simply how to find more joy in our lives. Because we have received so many questions – around 200! – further answers will be given in a second part, to be released next week.

The presenters are joined by frequent podcast guest Sister True Dedication (Sister Hien Nghiem). Topics which they address cover a wide range, from how to be brave, to speaking your truth and being fully yourself, and handling strong emotions and dealing with hate. Responses include practical examples, draw on both personal experiences and Buddhist wisdom, and cover numerous other topics, such as: non-attachment and healthy attachments; getting in touch with our patterns; building inner confidence; working with our negative seeds; letting go of pain; practicing with impermanence; the energy of prayer and interbeing; the power and purpose of Thay’s favorite chant, Namo Avalokiteshvara; and more. Plus: what is a mudra?

The three presenters also share their favorite daily reminders, sayings, or mantras for bringing them back to the path when they get distracted.

Thank you for listening, and for your questions!
Tune in next week for part two.

Enjoy!

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Co-produced by the Plum Village App:
https://plumvillage.app/

And Global Optimism:
https://globaloptimism.com/ 

With support from the Thich Nhat Hanh Foundation:
https://thichnhathanhfoundation.org/

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List of resources

Sister True Dedication
https://plumvillage.org/people/dharma-teachers/sister-hien-nghiem/ 

The Four Noble Truths
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=dy-RI3FrdGA

Dharma Talks: ‘True Love and the Four Noble Truths’
https://plumvillage.org/library/dharma-talks/true-love-and-the-four-noble-truths/ 

Bodhisattva
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bodhisattva 

‘Breathing In, Breathing Out’
https://plumvillage.org/library/songs/breathing-in-breathing-out/

Sister Jina
https://plumvillage.org/people/dharma-teachers/sr-dieu-nghiem/ 

The Five Mindfulness Trainings
https://plumvillage.org/mindfulness/the-5-mindfulness-trainings/ 

Pain, Despair, and the Second Arrow (a short Thich Nhat Hanh teaching video)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MlLvjFPtFXw

Sutras: ‘Discourse on the 5 Ways of Putting an End to Anger’
https://plumvillage.org/library/sutras/discourse-on-the-five-ways-of-putting-an-end-to-anger/

Abrahamic religions 
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Abrahamic_religions

Avalokiteśvara
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Avalokite%C5%9Bvara

Introduction to Namo Avalokiteshvara (a short Thich Nhat Hanh teaching video)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DjBUZrrqAVQ

‘Listening to Namo Avalokiteshvara’
https://plumvillage.app/listening-to-namo-avalokiteshvara/ 

Dharma Talks: ‘Listening to the Chant’
https://plumvillage.org/library/dharma-talks/listening-to-the-chant/

Namo’valokiteshvaraya Chant
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IZkjX_c4hm4

Mudra
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Mudra 

Nāgārjuna
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nagarjuna

Dharma Talks: ‘The Five Remembrances’
https://plumvillage.org/library/dharma-talks/the-five-remembrances-sr-thuan-nghiem-spring-retreat-2018-05-17/

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Quotes

“Buddhism has a great lineage tradition of mentoring and guidance, and we are all seekers on the path. But some of us have had more years of experience and mistakes and getting awakened to our suffering, and can share from that experience to help others.”

“Thay would always say a good question can help many of us who are listening in this moment, because a good question will allow a good answer to manifest.” 

“Each day that you have stillness, that you have well-being, acknowledge it; make it your moment of presence, of solidarity.”

“In the spirit of Zen, we have the warrior, and how we bring that warrior out is, first of all, by really knowing how to be with oneself when the emotions and storms are present. How do we recognize that and not be a victim of it? Not allowing ourselves to be the anger when the energy of anger manifests, not to be the fear when fear is present, and turtle away.”

“Thay teaches us that a mountain doesn’t move when there’s a storm. And that storm is the storm of our perceptions, our judgment. We’re not being carried away by what we see, what we hear, but we still have the insight of interbeing. Therefore we can still have right view and clarity.”

“I will not spread news that I do not know to be certain.”

“We are not our thoughts, we are not our speech; we are not defined by that. We are so much greater as a formation, as an entity, than all of these things. But we do want to be aware of our legacy in thinking, speech, and action.”

“In Buddhism, our negative seeds are just part of the garden that we’re composting. They’re something we’re working with, they’re something to embrace. And the good news of Buddhism is that when you see these seeds, you can get an enlightenment about them. That is the compost that we’re going to practice with: each time these seeds come up, try to make ourselves a little daisy. I may not be a lotus, but maybe one daisy for each seed.” 

“Some non-attachments are more difficult than others.”

“Attachment that brings suffering, let it go. The attachment that keeps you on the path: ‘I’m attached to my brown robe. I’m attached to my precepts. I’m attached to my sangha.’ We have to also let go of this view that in Zen there’s no thinking, there’s no feelings, there’s no emotions, there’s no attachment.”

“When the going gets tough, keep going.”

“‘Thanks to impermanence, everything is possible’ comes from a great teacher called Nagarjuna. It’s a Buddhist phrase. And it helps me trust that everything is evolving, everything is shifting. My internal landscape is shifting, the external landscape is shifting. And if it’s hard, it won’t last for long; it’s just a phase that we’re passing through.”

“Awareness is a mirror reflecting the four elements. Beauty is a heart that generates love and a mind that is open.”

“Life is too short for mirrors.”

“Our true actions are our continuation.”