187: What to do when my child says: “I’m booored!”?
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Zen Buddhism's Theory of Boredom and Discomfort
Zen Buddhism says that if you can tolerate and be with the boredom, you can gain important insights into your mind and self-identity. I've been practicing mindfulness for a few years now. And my default state is still to fill every moment with reading. But over the last few years, I've become more comfortable with doing nothing in particular and with unproductive time in general. This morning I planned to go for a bike ride, but I rearranged my schedule to do that tomorrow because Kerris wanted to go to the pool and practice what she's been learning in her swim class.
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Those of us in the Northern Hemisphere are in the middle of summer now, with the whirlwind of cobbled together childcare and kids at home saying: "I'm booored!".
What's happening for them when they're saying this?
And, more importantly, what should we DO about it?
We don't want to have to entertain them, but what other option is there besides threatening chores?
This episode will help you to answer their question during the summer months in a way that supports their wellbeing, and also address boredom that crops up at other points in the school year. Like when they're in school.
Because while I approached this episode from the perspective of navigating summer holidays, it turns out that most researchers can't include the word "child" and "bored" in a study without also including the word "school."
Begnaud, D., Coenraad, M., Jain, N., Patel, D., & Bonsignore, E. (2020). “It’s just too much”: Exploring children’s views of boredom and strategies to manage feelings of boredom. In: Proceedings of the Interaction Design and Children Conference (p.624-636).
Brankovic, S. (2015). Boredom, dopamine, and the thrill of psychosis: Psychiatry in a new key. Psychiatria Danubina 27(2), 126-137.
Danckert, J. (2022). Boredom in the COVID-19 Pandemic. Behavioral Science 12(1), 428.
Healy, S.D. (1984). Boredom, self, and culture. Rutherford: Farleigh Dickinson University Press.
hooks, b. (1994). Teaching to transgress: Education as the practice of freedom. New York: Routledge.
Joseph, N.M. (2022). Making Black girls count in math education: A Black feminist vision for transforming teaching. Boston: Harvard Education Press.
LaCapra, D. (2016). Trauma, history, memory, identity: What remains? History and Theory 55, 375-400.
Lehr, E., & Todman, M. (2008). Boredom and boredom proneness in children: Implications for academic and social adjustment. In: M. Todman (Ed). Self-Regulation and Social Competence: Psychological Studies in Identity, Achievement and Work-Family Dynamics (p.75-89). Athens: Athens Institute for Education and Research.
Lin, Y., & Westgate, E.C. (2021). The origins of boredom. Unpublished manuscript. Retrieved from: https://psyarxiv.com/bz6n8/download?format=pdf
Lomas, T. (2017). A meditation on boredom: Reappraising its value through introspective phenomenology. Qualitative Research in Psychology 14(1), 1-22.
Lomas, T. (2017). A reappraisal of boredom: A case study in second wave psychology. In: N.J.L. Brown, T. Lomas, & F.J. Eiroa-Orosa (Eds.), The Routledge International Handbook of Critical Positive Psychology (p.213-226). Abingdon-on-Thames: Routledge.
Musharbash, Y. (2007). Boredom, time, and modernity: An example from Aboriginal Australia. American Anthropologist 109(2), 307-317.
O’Hanlon, J.F. (1981). Boredom: Practical consequences and a theory. Acta Psychologica 49, 53-82.
Pfattheicher, S., Lazarevic, L.B., Westgate, E.C., & Schindler, S. (2021). On the relation of boredom and sadistic aggression. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology 121(3), 573-600.
Toohey, P. (2011). Boredom: A lively history. New Haven: Yale University Press.
Waterschoot, J., Van der Kaap-Deeder, J., Morbee, S., Soenens, B., & Vansteenkiste, M. (2021). “How to unlock myself from boredom?” The role of mindfulness and a dual awareness- and action-oriented pathway during the COVID-19 lockdown. Personality and Individual Differences 175, 110729.
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00:59 Introduction to today’s topic 02:32 Dr. Peter Toohey's book explores various definitions of boredom, including one tied to predictable circumstances and another linked to existential despair. 04:16 The concept of boredom has evolved over time. 07:57 Boredom can be linked to dopamine levels in the brain. 10:45 Boredom is connected to negative outcomes and low dopamine activity, leading to depression, anxiety, addiction, and poor performance 13:51 Boredom in children, particularly in school, has negative consequences on academic outcomes and well-being 23:32 Exercising autonomy and pursuing assignments aligned with personal interest and relevance can foster intrinsic motivation and enhance student performance and well-being 29:53 The traditional school system prioritizes conformity over individual interests, leading to disengagement and boredom 35:47 The Learning Membership offers support and resources for parents to cultivate their child's intrinsic love of learning, whether they are in school or not 38:18 Students can combat boredom in school by gamifying tasks, finding personal meaning in them, and recognizing the value of boredom as a guide to more engaging activities 42:54 Boredom serves a purpose in learning by promoting exploration, enhancing performance on creative tasks, and signaling the need for novelty and change 45:26 The Warlpiri people in Australia embody a cultural mindset of infinite patience and being fully present in the moment, where boredom seems non-existent as they engage with their surroundings and find meaning in the immediate place and time 48:17 As explored through the lens of Buddhism, embracing boredom allows us to gain insights into our minds and self-identity, fostering a sense of peace 52:40 To wrap up, the response to a child's boredom depends on their environment–whether they are in school or at homeReferences
https://www.gotoquiz.com/results/boredom_proness_scaleBegnaud, D., Coenraad, M., Jain, N., Patel, D., & Bonsignore, E. (2020). “It’s just too much”: Exploring children’s views of boredom and strategies to manage feelings of boredom. In: Proceedings of the Interaction Design and Children Conference (p.624-636).
Brankovic, S. (2015). Boredom, dopamine, and the thrill of psychosis: Psychiatry in a new key. Psychiatria Danubina 27(2), 126-137.
Danckert, J. (2022). Boredom in the COVID-19 Pandemic. Behavioral Science 12(1), 428.
Healy, S.D. (1984). Boredom, self, and culture. Rutherford: Farleigh Dickinson University Press.
hooks, b. (1994). Teaching to transgress: Education as the practice of freedom. New York: Routledge.
Joseph, N.M. (2022). Making Black girls count in math education: A Black feminist vision for transforming teaching. Boston: Harvard Education Press.
LaCapra, D. (2016). Trauma, history, memory, identity: What remains? History and Theory 55, 375-400.
Lehr, E., & Todman, M. (2008). Boredom and boredom proneness in children: Implications for academic and social adjustment. In: M. Todman (Ed). Self-Regulation and Social Competence: Psychological Studies in Identity, Achievement and Work-Family Dynamics (p.75-89). Athens: Athens Institute for Education and Research.
Lin, Y., & Westgate, E.C. (2021). The origins of boredom. Unpublished manuscript. Retrieved from: https://psyarxiv.com/bz6n8/download?format=pdf
Lomas, T. (2017). A meditation on boredom: Reappraising its value through introspective phenomenology. Qualitative Research in Psychology 14(1), 1-22.
Lomas, T. (2017). A reappraisal of boredom: A case study in second wave psychology. In: N.J.L. Brown, T. Lomas, & F.J. Eiroa-Orosa (Eds.), The Routledge International Handbook of Critical Positive Psychology (p.213-226). Abingdon-on-Thames: Routledge.
Musharbash, Y. (2007). Boredom, time, and modernity: An example from Aboriginal Australia. American Anthropologist 109(2), 307-317.
O’Hanlon, J.F. (1981). Boredom: Practical consequences and a theory. Acta Psychologica 49, 53-82.
Pfattheicher, S., Lazarevic, L.B., Westgate, E.C., & Schindler, S. (2021). On the relation of boredom and sadistic aggression. Journal of Personality and Social Psychology 121(3), 573-600.
Toohey, P. (2011). Boredom: A lively history. New Haven: Yale University Press.
Waterschoot, J., Van der Kaap-Deeder, J., Morbee, S., Soenens, B., & Vansteenkiste, M. (2021). “How to unlock myself from boredom?” The role of mindfulness and a dual awareness- and action-oriented pathway during the COVID-19 lockdown. Personality and Individual Differences 175, 110729.
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