At the root of failure and a fear of failure is shame, which is a very unpleasant emotion associated with feeling like you're a bad person or are a flawed or defective individual. And there's another key reason we avoid failure and it has to do with the perception of interpersonal or group shame. If I make a mistake, if I fail, how does that affect who I am and how I see myself, as well as how others see me? How will others see me is such a huge element of this anti failure conundrum.