The Importance of Love

Dolly Laman's research showed that initially destructive emotions are stimulated by some form of trigger after which there's an appraisal period followed by a response. For most people, the trigger reflexively produces a conditional response like a reflex. With presence awareness and attention to our breathing, we can also be aware that we can appraise the situation before responding in ways that are likely to add fire to fire. Using mindfulness, extending the duration of the appraisal period so we can actually respond in positive ways is really what it takes. When we do accept responsibility for managing our mind, using mindfulness and working with our negative emotions in constructive ways, something amazing happens.

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