2min chapter

The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish cover image

#71 Esther Perel: Cultivating Desire

The Knowledge Project with Shane Parrish

CHAPTER

Couples and Relationships - What Are the Most Common Argument Patterns?

There are three primary coreographies of aof arguments. One person attacks, but the other person flees or withdraws. The third one is you got both people basically closing the door going into their room and not talking to each other for two days. If you have people who are going at each other, they go at each other about everything. Their style is, we attack, and every subject will be spoken like that. It's not the particular issue that makes them close the door. They close the door, and every issue they will discuss till it with the same dance. And what you're challenging in a couple is the dance, is the rigidity of the way that they go

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