Motivation and Setting Realistic Expectations

In this week's episode of Taking Control: The ADHD Podcast, hosts Nikki Kinzer and Pete Wright interview Dr. Tamara Rosier about motivation and ADHD. Dr. Rosier, author of "Your Brain's Not Broken," shares insights from her experiences as an ADHD coach and professor to uncover motivation strategies for those with ADHD.

As Dr. Rosier explains of those living with ADHD, "There is really no research explaining our success in the modern world." Her book aims to send a "love letter" to those struggling, affirming that "You're okay. And I know it feels hard for you, but you're still okay."

The hosts dive into the complicated relationship between ADHD and motivation. Dr. Rosier notes that while ADHD can make people appear self-centered as they struggle to survive, most "are incredibly sensitive" and "heart forward." Pete adds that ADHD allows people to "forget the important things"—like basic needs—while seeking self-actualization. Dr. Rosier agrees this makes success especially difficult, as "easy things are very difficult" for those with ADHD, yet they still accomplish much.

To build motivation, Dr. Rosier suggests first assessing your values—why something matters. She coaches Nikki to uncover beliefs like "I should enjoy cooking" that create pressure. Next, acknowledge the difficulty but willingness to do hard things. Tie actions to values, not beliefs that demotivate. Dr. Rosier advises imagining your future self; what actions would serve them well? For her, laying out morning clothes helps future Tamara. Finally, notice existing successes instead of dismissing them. Despite feeling inconsistent, for example, Pete already walks his dog each and every morning.

While discussing motivation, Dr. Rosier exposes thought patterns that sabotage us. Beating yourself up rarely helps. Instead, start by naming emotions and difficulties without judgment. Accept dissonance between wants and responsibilities. Motivation takes self-awareness, values exploration, and celebrating every step forward.

Here are a few key takeaways:

• How ADHD impacts motivation and success
• Steps to take to understand and build motivation
• How to shift from self-judgment to self-acceptance
• Strategies to uncover motivation blocks like beliefs
• The importance of aligning actions with values
• Ways to celebrate small consistency wins

With compassionate insight, Dr. Rosier exposes why motivation is so complex yet possible. This inspiring episode explores practical strategies to overcome motivation challenges. Anyone seeking to understand themselves and build motivation from within will find this a thoughtful listen.

Links & Notes

• Learn more about Dr. Tamara Rosier
• Follow Dr. Tamara Rosier on LinkedIn
• Get the book: “Your Brain's Not Broken: Strategies for Navigating Your Emotions and Life with ADHD” by Dr. Tamara Rosier

• (00:00) - Welcome to The ADHD Podcast
• (02:49) - Support This Podcast: Become a Patron at Patreon.com/theadhdpodcast
• (04:22) - Introducing Dr. Tamara Rosier
• (14:28) - Separating Feeling from Motivation
• (18:18) - Motivation and Self-Actualization
• (26:20) - Ego and Self-Centered Worldview
• (31:57) - Tying Motivation to a Value
• (33:36) - Coaching FOR Nikki!
• (57:00) - Learn More