Is There a Dream That You Want to Have for Your Future?

Don't set a vision or a shared dream of what you want that's going to end up pulling you apart until you get there. Try and find something that brings value and meaning to both of you, both of you first. Be creative with it. It can be e can be whatever you dream it to be, right?

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Many people have this fairy tale view of love in which there is always passion, a lot of sex and everything feels wonderful. It may appear that way at the start of the relationship but once the infatuation stage wears off, the reality sets in. You'll then realize your partner isn't as perfect as you thought. So, what comes next?

In this episode, Kimberly Holmes gives an in-depth explanation of the three components of love and the four stages of the love path, as well as some actionable steps you can take to keep the fire burning in your relationship.

Kimberly Beam Holmes has applied her master’s degree in psychology for over 10 years, acting as the CEO of Marriage Helper & CEO and Host of her own podcast, It Starts with Attraction, being a wife and mother herself, and researching the ways that attraction affects people personally and the relationships that they hold dear.

She is currently working on her Ph.D. in psychology. Kimberly lives in Franklin, Tennessee with her husband, Rob, and two beautiful children from India.

Check out the transcript of this episode on Dr. Jessica Higgin's website.

In this episode

4:13 Kimberly defines love and talks about a framework to falling in love.

6:04 The three components of love.

10:00 What happens when infatuation or limerence wears off?

17:47 How to overcome the power struggle stage.

25:27 How do you build commitment in a relationship.

30:05 What you should intentionally focus on as a couple when life tries to pull you apart.

34:00 How to cultivate strong attachment?

44:14 How they’re helping couples save their struggling relationships at Marriage Helper.

Mentioned

Triangular theory of love by Robert Sternberg (*Wikipedia)