Is This Really Your Thing?

i decided very early on that i was going to be optimistic. And so when part of my brain was really worried about dying, I just sort of like pushed it over to the side and said, but i am still going to do everything i need to do. One of the circumstances is the fact that, a, my own emotions are often somewhat invisible to me. It's in my chart. It’s in my upbringing. When i feel sad, body's going to fock off if they don't like it, right? I can be i can be sad and upset, and i can feel tender feelings. The other part of me was like, an wo to cry when