I'm Still on the Run From Her, but Can I Accept Her?

This morning i was thinking back to me in my twenties, what a very different person i was. I believed in a linear kind of success and placed so much of my self worth in its hands. My lack of confidence led to me making several mistakes and bad choices that have followed me through life. In the process of sprinting away from her, i've given up the good bits she had as well as the bad. Can i accept her without using sympathy as my means to make the peace? Make more mistakes? Often we feel heavy from our past. The version of us that walked the planet a decade ago still taps us on the shoulder to remind us of our mistakes. Just go easy