Do You Realize You're Hurting Me?

With emotionally abusive relationships, i tell partners or spouses in romantic relationships that when they hurt you, you ask the question, do you realize you're hurting me? I think that's a fair question. When you ask someone that question, it empowers them to discover that they're doing behavior that hurts you. Some aren't affected by your crying, by your hurting. They just know that no matter how they act, you're still there. And so again, this is an important lesson to take with us, that when we don't provide accountability, we may not get any different behavior from them. So if your visible suffering isn't enough for them to change, then it's time.