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How to Make Great Relationships with Dr. Rick Hanson

The One You Feed

The Importance of Fearless and Searching Inventory in Relationships

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In 12 step recovery, we talked all the time about keeping our side of the street clean. And what comes from that is a degree of peace. In relationship, this becomes very difficult at times because we go, well, my intent was, and you took it x way. The tone about the shoes in the doorway might be a two on its own. But if you've talked with that tone for five years, it might be an eight now. If your partner had a dad who was slightly angry, when you use a very mildly angry tone, they might react it in eight. So impact and intent can very often be mismatched.

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