i think the tendency is like, oh, the child's calm now, so now i don't have to deal with anything. And just like in the difficult conversations, i know that my and this is something, i mean, from we got together, let's say i was in middle age. You weren't quite there yet, but nina, we were late. We had all, we have each had significant relationships, and one of our sort of early rules was, we can talk about anything. I'm far more likely to make it to the gym when i look at a spread sheet than i am ecause i have this sort of linear process,. which kind of brings me round

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