Invisible Burdens: Women and Household Management

As many of you know, following one organizer will bring you to another. In fact, that’s how some of you ended up in my community. So many of you reached out suggesting Kendra Adachi with The Lazy Genius podcast for an interview for the Monday Connections episodes. Thank you so much for the recommendation and we had an insightful conversation.  

Lazy Genius

Kendra Adachi was a perfectionist to the extreme. She was teacher’s pet, valedictorian, and voted most dependable by her peers. In 2015, she started a lifestyle blog. The podcast, The Lazy Genius, followed not even a full year later. She teaches women to “Be a genius about the things that matter, and and lazy about the things that don’t.” Once she became a parent she learned that rule. She was so used to doing everything perfectly but once her second child came along she realized you can’t be perfect at everything. And that’s how she got to pointing out to women how to find a happy medium between Boss Babe and Hot Mess. 

We agreed how nice it is to come on an episode with an idea and through the recording think out loud. Inevitably we end up with feedback from the community that results in solutions or next steps. When I asked her if she worries about running out of episode topics. She replied with the fact that the perspective on laundry changes with your lifestyle. For example, she may be talking about endless stained laundry from toddlers and grow to sharing about how she is teaching her teenagers how to do laundry. We commented on the value our listeners get from hearing how a female is doing things. Kendra shared that 93% of time management books are from male authors. It’s time for women to learn from each other. 

And Kendra shared about “Big Black Trash Bag Energy”. You know when you’re just over it and so you get out the big trash bag with the internet to toss everything and just start over? No need. Just start small. Work on one thing. 

Women Have Always Ran the World

Kendra shared the point of view that maybe there’s a stigma to the importance of the female role and how much men value what women do. And I agreed through the lens that  women have always ran the world but now that women are in the workforce, it’s coming to light how much women are really doing. And sorry guys, it’s more than you. Men get to watch a football game but women feel like they need to be productive making the meal plan or planning car pool while watching that same football game. We have been the CEO’s of the households but now all that invisible work is being identified. We have these never ending tasks that replenish themselves and leads to weary spirits. Planning is essential for women to manage the household and take care of everyone. Kendra pointed out you are inherently a preparer, an adjuster, or a notice-er. And then we talked about the mindsets and lifestyles of being 30, 40, and in your 50’s. And the two scenarios determine how you got about what you gotta get done.

You Only Know What You Know

I find it so difficult to find other women CEO’s to learn from. We joked those women are too busy to sit down to write a book or record a podcast. My hope is for all women in the 20’s and 30’s to find a community to show them systems on how to be a household manager. You get a new job, you get training. You buy your first house and you’re responsible for the payments but no guidelines on how to care for it. Up to you to hopefully stumble across the Household Operations Binder. Don’t get intimidated by the CEO role. It’s not meant to be this manly corporate role. You only know what you have been taught. Women need to be in community with each other, doing life together. We are the experts in this role! 

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