I'm Not So Small, but It's Big, Right?

I think the point around it's not about the action that hurts, it's about how that action makes some one feel. And sometimes saying things, like remarks of that are in a sarcastic tone, on whatever, actually those things can build up and you feel like your saying it in a joky way. So i realize just asking you in a polite, in a sweet way, in a loving way, can have so much more impact than me sarcastically throwing something in there. I've noticed the difference that it makes in the way that we speak to each other when we think about it instead of shouting out what comes into our mind.