How Do You Write a Book?

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Jonathan Safran Foer: I want to zoom the lens out a little bit. When you decide to write a book and you're necessarily telling the stories, not just of you, but of your entire family, their individual stories. And especially you, right? Because you've made your bones for a lot of years as this phenomenal journalist who goes into super high power situations. He says there is great responsibility in telling any part of anybody else's story. But he adds that when we heal ourselves or participate in the process of healing ourselves, we also contribute to the healing of others.

So, what’s your biggest secret? And, what’s the cost you’ve been bearing for living, or trying to live, under its weight?

For many of us, it’s wrapped around our identity. There’s something about us we don’t want others to know. The idea of being your 100% authentic self, meaning no secrets, no masks, and no pretending, in front of your family, of all people, is something that sounds terrifying, if not impossible. But, what if the opposite were true? What if living behind the facade was actually the more brutalizing experience, one that sustains, possibly for years, decades, even life? In contrast to the momentary or even season of disruption incited by coming out as your true self, yet followed by a lifetime of liberation?

That’s where we’re headed in today’s conversation with Jessi Hempel, whose own revelation about her sexual identity, became the first in a chain of "coming out" events that touched every member of her family. Jessi is the host of the award-winning podcast Hello Monday, and she's a senior editor-at-large at LinkedIn. Jessi's striking upcoming memoir, The Family Outing, is a fascinating look into Jessi's seemingly picture-perfect American family, whose lives slowly start to unravel after a series of coming outs. In our chat, we uncover universal revelations, like seeing and realizing the humanity in your parents for the first time and the liberation that comes with claiming your whole truths—even in the face of uncertainty. Jessi opens up about the complexities of growing up with two parents struggling with emotional turmoil and learning to embrace her imperfect family as each of them shed their secrets and found, or rediscovered, their place in the world.

You can find Jessi at: LinkedIn | Hello Monday with Jessi Hempel podcast

If you LOVED this episode you’ll also love the conversations we had with Jake Wesley Rogers about bringing all parts of himself to work and life.

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