The more people accept you and your flaws, ironically, the easier it is to be mindful. "Self-compassion doesn't provide answers about how to resolve a conflict," she says. The thing that's going to be compassionate towards myself is going to conflict with being compassionate towards someone else. 'It's not totally natural to be self-compassionate'
Self-compassion isn't selfish, says psychologist Kristin Neff, a pioneer in research on the topic. Kristin busts cultural myths about self-compassion, such as the idea that it makes us lazy or self-indulgent, and explains why it’s actually a more effective motivational tool than self-criticism. She also breaks down why fostering more self-compassion is a better strategy than trying to boost self-esteem and offers some simple practices for being kinder to ourselves.
If you enjoyed this episode, we recommend this one from the archives: “The Science of Our Inner Voice.”
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