How to Sand Down Friction Points in Your Life

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There are friction points in our lives. How do we sand it down? How do we fix it? And then the third part is, have we done a good job? That applies to our own personal lives as well. It's been a very useful practice for me and for a lot of the people that I've worked with. Is a great practice. So all of our listeners go out and buy the book so you can learn exactly how to do it for yourself, but also for your organization.

We all get stuck. In relationships, in jobs or in creative endeavors. It’s a universal experience, yet most people feel incredibly lonely when they’re stuck. By shedding light on the latest research, bestselling author Adam Alter expertly unravels the psychological and practical steps you need to get unstuck.

Adam Alter PhD is a professor of Marketing at New York University's Stern School of Business with an affiliate appointment in the Psychology Department. Adam has spent the past two decades studying how people become stuck and how they free themselves to thrive. He is the author of bestsellers Drunk Tank Pink and Irresistible but we talk with him on this episode about his latest book, Anatomy of a Breakthrough: How to Get Unstuck When It Matters Most.

As someone who has kept decades of notes on interesting observations from his life, Adam peppers all his work with relatable personal stories. One of the trends of Adam’s observations from over the years is that music has provided a stream of interesting anecdotes. So it will come as no surprise to regular listeners of the Behavioral Grooves, that Tim thoroughly enjoyed talking about how music has influenced Adam’s life, research and writing!

We hope you enjoy listening to our light hearted discussion with Adam and if you would like to support the work of Behavioral Grooves, you can become a Patreon member of the show: https://www.patreon.com/behavioralgrooves.

Topics

(3:30) Welcome and speed round questions.

(4:31) Creativity is a result of productivity not insight.

(6:38) Where do people get stuck in their lives?

(7:42) Narrow bracketing - how to get rid of the messy middle.

(9:55) Why is it so hard to get unstuck?

(12:08) How to reframe difficulties as challenges.

(15:52) In hierarchical organizations, the personality of leaders matters.

(18:30) How to fail well.

(23:07) Are constraints liberating?

(26:34) The 3 part process of a friction audit?

(29:29) What is hardship inoculation?

(34:06) Finding the people who magically unstick your team.

(38:48) What makes a great band?

(42:46) How Universal Basic Income (UBI) can harness creative breakthroughs.

(45:28) Why music is a huge part of Adam’s book.

(48:10) How the economy actually dictates our musical choices.

(53:39) The music that Adam listens to.

(57:37) Grooving Session with Kurt and Tim on getting unstuck.

Links

Adam Alter’s book “Anatomy of a Breakthrough: How to Get Unstuck When It Matters Most”: https://amzn.to/3NHkQ6z

Episode 276, How To Stay Motivated So You Exceed Your Goals with Ayelet Fishbach PhD: https://behavioralgrooves.com/episode/motivation-to-exceed-your-goals/

Episode 307, Groove Track - Mind Over Milkshakes: Why Expectations Matter A Lot: https://behavioralgrooves.com/episode/mind-over-milkshakes-groove-track/

Michael Lewis “Moneyball: The Art of Winning an Unfair Game”: https://amzn.to/46dqbJV

Greg Lukianoff and Jonathan Haidt, “The Coddling of the American Mind: How Good Intentions and Bad Ideas Are Setting Up a Generation for Failure”: https://amzn.to/3NSRItb

Episode 64, Danny Oppenheimer: Governance and Helicopter Parenting: https://behavioralgrooves.com/episode/danny-oppenheimer-governance-and-helicopter-parenting/

Behavioral Grooves Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/behavioralgrooves

Musical Links

EDM, trance music: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Xptn9MHiAdo

Alice in Chains “Man In The Box”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TAqZb52sgpU

Bob Dylan “Like A Rolling Stone”: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IwOfCgkyEj0