The Freedom of Self-Forgetfulness

I think there's a really good book called The Freedom of Self-Forgetfulness. It talks about how in Western ideals, like if someone has low self-esteem, the solution is to be like you're doing very well. But true humility isn't thinking less of yourself, but thinking of yourself less. And so the answer to people who have high self-esteem is into like lowering them or bringing them up. That just seemed very like antithesis to what I was taught as an Asian American Christian. As I've grown older and realized these new concepts, it just seems very drastically radically different from a lot of what I feel like I was taught.