How to Deal With Rage

When we have a trigger, we go directly into that trigger. We go directly into the trigger so we can talk to the part of us that is so triggered. And what I wanted to do was pull this part out of me just with my mind's eye and put it next to me in this passenger seat. So then I said, okay, I am, I need to know, wait, let me think what I said. What's underneath this anger and rage? And when I asked that question, it was, that's where the big shift came. The words started coming.

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Guess what? I got triggered this week. AND I was able to work through the trigger and meet the most beautiful younger part of myself using the tools in The Adult Chair® model.

In this episode, I’m letting you guys in on exactly what happened and walking you step-by-step through how I transformed this trigger — and how you can use the exact same process the next time you’re triggered.

It all started with a relatively simple interaction with my husband, Graham. Though we didn’t have a fight, this interaction brought up feelings of anger and rage in me.

As I dug into those feelings, I found that a 10-year-old part of me was feeling really scared and unsafe because the interaction reminded her of an unpredictable situation from childhood. And what happened afterwards was SO POWERFUL that it still gives me chills!

Listen to discover:

● What triggers are and where they come from

● Why triggers are a HUGE opportunity to heal

● The step-by-step trigger tool I used to transform my trigger

● A powerful script for working with younger, scared parts of self

● How working with triggers can lead to healthier relationships

The really cool thing is that instead of letting my anger create a fight between Graham and me, we were able to have a really authentic conversation about what happened, and I left feeling seen and supported. This is the power of doing our work!

I wanted to openly share this story to not only equip you with the tools to work through a trigger, but also to show you that the goal isn’t to “arrive” or “stop getting triggered.” The goal is to do the lifelong work of turning inward to get to know and transform ourselves so we can connect more deeply with self and others.

"There are tools within this model that help us to heal and transform whatever is going on in our lives." - Michelle Chalfant

"We have so many parts that are within us. So, when you get triggered, remember, it's an unconscious belief that's rising up inside of [you]." - Michelle Chalfant

"Triggers are an opportunity for us to see what is unknown within ourselves." - Michelle Chalfant

"Oftentimes anger and rage...it's a defense against a more vulnerable emotion." - Michelle Chalfant

"Our emotions oftentimes are stacked." - Michelle Chalfant

"Nobody can make you feel anything. How you feel is already within you." - Michelle Chalfant

"Working with triggers is such an important thing to help us to heal and live with emotional balance…Working with triggers is a way to stay connected to yourself." - Michelle Chalfant

LINKS & RESOURCES

Summer 2023 Adult Chair® Coaching Certification - Doors Now Open!

https://theadultchair.com/certification

MORE ADULT CHAIR

The Adult Chair® Website

https://theadultchair.com

The Adult Chair Events

https://theadultchair.com/events/

The Adult Chair® Coaching Certification

https://theadultchair.com/certification

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