Why bans don't stop predators

In this deeply emotional solo episode, I continue our December series focused on protecting kids from online predators. I walk you through two real and devastating cases that show exactly how grooming, sextortion, and long-term digital harassment happen—often without parents having any idea it's occurring. These aren't edge cases. This is the reality of the digital world our kids are growing up in.

We break down a Roblox grooming case involving an eight-year-old girl, how predators slowly build trust and move conversations to private apps, and why platform bans don't actually stop them. I also share the heartbreaking story of Amanda Todd, a seventh grader who was hunted online for years by a predator who weaponized images, social media, and bullying across schools and borders. This episode is hard to listen to—but necessary—because awareness is the first step in protecting our kids.

Timeline Summary:

[0:00] Why online grooming often goes unnoticed until it's too late.

[1:48] How predators now access kids directly in their bedrooms through devices.

[2:46] Why this generation of parents is navigating entirely new digital dangers.

[3:52] Parenting the first generation of kids growing up fully online.

[4:20] Introducing a real Roblox grooming case involving an eight-year-old girl.

[5:24] How predators use in-game chat and "helping" to gain trust.

[6:18] The move from public game chat to private apps like WhatsApp.

[6:44] Grooming tactics that feel like friendship to kids.

[7:09] How exploitation and sextortion begin once trust is built.

[8:07] Why platform bans don't stop predators from returning.

[9:06] Key lessons parents must understand about Roblox and open chat systems.

[10:06] Larry shares a personal experience with a suspicious "wrong number" text.

[11:54] Why text messages and private apps are also major risk areas.

[12:25] Introducing the Amanda Todd case from British Columbia.

[12:52] How sextortion followed Amanda across schools and years.

[13:58] Why Amanda wasn't bullied—she was hunted.

[14:27] The mental health toll of long-term digital harassment.

[15:18] Amanda's nine-minute YouTube video explaining her story.

[15:49] Arrest, conviction, and sentencing of her predator years later.

[16:41] Why one image can give predators long-term control.

[17:39] How predators weaponize anonymity, time, and technology.

[18:38] Why Bark has helped Larry catch issues proactively for seven years.

[19:26] How parents can honor victims by protecting their own kids.

[20:11] Final call to action to monitor devices and stay engaged.

Five Key Takeaways

1. Online grooming happens slowly and quietly, often disguised as friendship and "help" inside games like Roblox.
2. Predators almost always move kids from public chats to private apps, where there is no moderation or logging.
3. One image is all a predator needs to control, extort, and emotionally destroy a child over time.
4. Platform bans do not protect kids, because predators can create new accounts in minutes.
5. Parental awareness and monitoring can change outcomes, and proactive conversations can prevent lifelong trauma.

Links & Resources

• Bark Monitoring for Families: https://thedadedge.com/bark
• Episode Show Notes & Resources: https://thedadedge.com/1415
• Mentioned Link: https://www.amandatoddlegacy.org/aydin-coban.html?utm_source=chatgpt.com

Closing Remark

These stories are hard—but they matter. The best way we can honor kids who've been hurt or lost is by protecting our own. Please rate, review, follow, and share this episode, and most importantly, stay involved in your kids' digital lives. From my heart to yours—let's do better.