3min chapter

ReThinking cover image

The science of healthy relationships with John and Julie Gottman

ReThinking

CHAPTER

Do You Have a Knowing Doing Gap?

Adam Gottman: I run into a knowing doing gap where I don't take the knowledge that I have and put it into practice in the moment. He says expert negotiators are more likely to label their own feelings and the other persons, except when it came to negative behaviors. Gottman: How do you gently let them know? Adam: What you can say is, honey, I'm feeling defensive. It's not about you. It's about me.

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