A healthy boundary distinguishes between the behavior of another person and what you are willing to do about it. A threat tries to influence another by making them feel scared or guilty, whereas a boundary is just telling them what matters to you. When we are trying to keep somebody in a relationship through a threat, we are acting dependently. It is a form of dependency which focuses on emotional connection to the extreme. Even if it means I must manipulate another. That's how you know that it's intended as manipulation and not really as a boundary.

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