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The Importance of Tone in Polite Conversation
There are two great enemies to polite conversation: fractiousness and disagreement about religion and politics. But he says the other is familiarity - you mustn't be too familiar. You've got to have moral seriousness, but at the same time you mustn’t become theologically earnest. The most serious subjects can be touched on gently and lightly without provoking. It was soon sort of as hypocritical, as effeminate, and the word then used as French-ified. There's always a fear that it could be hypocritical, but it's supposed to be a synthesis between manners and morals.