Seeing Mind Patterns While Caring for a Parent

Speaking across the decades from the 1960s to the 2010s, Ram Dass shares stories about his mother and father, and explores what it means to honor our parents and incarnation. 

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This episode of Here and Now is a compilation of Ram Dass discussing what it means to honor our parents and our incarnation. 

• We begin in 1969 at the family farm in New Hampshire. Ram Dass talks about how most of our efforts to help other people are simply high drama. He tells a story about wanting to speak with his mother about dying when she was going through that process, but she had to be the one to open the door to the conversation.
• The next stop is the 1970s at the Abode of the Message in New Lebanon, New York. Ram Dass explores how part of the spiritual journey is about honoring incarnation and honoring our parents. He shares stories about spending time with his father, and how moments of intimacy between them were born of Ram Dass not trying to be someone special anymore.  
• We move on to a 1985 Seva benefit in San Rafael, California. Ram Dass discusses moving back home at 50 to care for his aging father. He then tells the story of being called home from a meditation retreat to help his sick stepmother, and a moment of anger he felt towards his guru about what was happening.
• Up next is a trip to the 1990s at the Conscious Aging Retreat in Clearwater, Florida. Ram Dass responds to a question about helping a child awaken. He talks about how you have to become somebody before you become nobody, and recalls a memory where he and his mother overcame their roles of parent and child for a brief moment.
• Finally, we end with a conversation between Ram Dass and John Welshons on Maui in 2011. Ram Dass tells the story of a meditation retreat that turned into a therapy group, which triggered a memory from when he was a young child and his mother was holding him down during a temper tantrum. Ram Dass tries to reconcile this memory with the moment when his guru told him his mother is a very high soul. 

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About Ram Dass:

Ram Dass’s spirit has been a guiding light for generations, carrying millions along on the journey. Ram Dass teaches that through the Bhakti practice of unconditional love, we can all connect with our true nature. Through these teachings, Ram Dass has shared a little piece of his guru, Maharaj-ji, with all who have listened to him. Learn more at ramdass.org.

“Now, I’ve done this, being with my father once a month now, for several years, because I said to myself, ‘Look, you have to honor your incarnation. And one of the aspects of your incarnation is that you are your father’s son.’ And even though, on some level, that seems kind of funny, it happens to be part of what it’s about. Just like I have to honor the fact that I am an American. I have to pay my taxes. I have to do a lot of stuff. And this is one of the things, I must honor it. And then I have to figure out—what does it mean to honor it? What does it mean to honor it? What does it mean to honor parents?” – Ram Dass

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