Being Well with Forrest Hanson and Dr. Rick Hanson cover image

How to Become Securely Attached

Being Well with Forrest Hanson and Dr. Rick Hanson

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The Power of Conscious Competence

A key first step is to acknowledge the electric wire fences that bound what people are comfortable with. As a therapist, I'm sitting there attempting to be someone that a client can securely attach to. And then when it starts to happen,. their tendencies to rest in insecure attachment modes of relating get stronger as a kind of resistance to the subtle gravitational pull for me. There's a defensiveness. Of course you did that. It's understandable. You get underneath the defense or the inhibition, right? The maintenance of the bars of the cage. And you start to realize, oh, wow, that's why I'm this way.

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