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Secure Relating, Not the Same as Secure Attachment with Ann & Sue (190)
Therapist Uncensored Podcast
Do I Hold Value in Myself and in the Other Person?
Sally Kohn: We can't learn when our hippocampus is offline. So what you're really doing by soft starts, Gottman talks a lot about soft starts. She says to be in a secure way, am I aware of myself and my body? Do I hold value in myself and do I holdvalue in the other person? You mentioned a lot about being kind and I think that's huge. That doesn't mean that in the moment we're only acting in a kind way. It means that we might still be upset but I can be upset and I can hold you.
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