How to Be a Better Person

As the saying goes, “Worrying is praying for what you don’t want.” A close cousin is future-tripping: projecting and living in the future instead of being present with what is actually happening, keeping an open mind about whatever might happen next. 

If you are inclined to catastrophize, you’re not alone! But getting caught in a fictional movie can mean missing out on important opportunities, ideas, and relationships. Today, I’m talking about why we do this, how future-tripping manifests, and strategies for shifting into what I call present-calming instead.

This crossover episode originally aired on the Pivot podcast on March 5, 2023.

🌟 15 Strategies for Shifting from Future-Tripping to Present-Calming:

1. Notice when you’re in a movie where you’re projecting events and possibilities rather than being present to the actual facts at hand. 
2. Be compassionate with your fearful side, as being hard on yourself doesn’t help.
3. Take a page from The Work with Byron Katie by asking, “Is that true? Can I absolutely know that it’s true?”
4. Pause and reflect: What are the facts versus what am I assuming?
5. Reframe what you are experiencing as an open-ended, creative question.
6. Trust yourself to be creative and resourceful at every next step as it arises.
7. Intuition happens in the moment, so ground yourself in the present.
8. Be grateful for the abundance that the problem you are facing represents.
9. Create and hold a positive vision of what is possible if all goes as well as it possibly can (instead of worst-case catastrophizing).
10. Listen to relaxing podcasts or meditations if you have trouble sleeping due to anxious thoughts. 
11. Take a small step or positive action toward a solution.
12. Limit your exposure to negative news. Or all news, for that matter!
13. Get your endorphins flowing with 20-minutes of cardio or yoga
14. Talk to an energizing friend or family member to get an outside perspective
15. Surrender. Ask for clarity on what action to take (or not) and for grace and patience in the meantime.

✅ Try this next: Notice when you’re caught in a movie of the future, generating anxiety from a problem or situation causing you stress. Ask to be shown one next step, and stay attuned to clues or hits of inspiration or intuition in your environment.

Do you have any strategies for present-calming? Send me a note at hello@itspivotmethod.com or leave me a voice memo at pivotmethod.com/ask.

📘Books: 

• Free Time: Lose The Busywork, Love Your Business
• Pivot: The Only Move That Matters Is Your Next One
• Life After College
• Loving What Is: Four Questions That Can Change Your Life by Byron Katie
• Nonviolent Communication: A Language of Life: Life-Changing Tools for Healthy Relationships by Marshall Rosenberg

🔗Resources:

• Byron Katie: TheWork.com and Judge Your Neighbor worksheet
• TV Series: Harlem via Amazon Prime (clip pulled from S2 E4)
• JB’s Ideal Day Madlib
• Sleep Foundations: The Best Podcasts for Sleep 
• Jordan Harbinger: 6-Minute Networking Course

🎧Related Podcast Episodes:

• [Best Of] Penney & Jenny 1: Intuition and Frequency (listen to the full Spotify playlist of the Penney & Jenny Show)
• 282: The Honor Roll Hangover with Melody Wilding
• 260: Everyday Rituals and the 'Sparkling of the Sacred' with Casper ter Kuile
• 69: Worrier's Guide to the End of the World with Torre DeRoche
• Free Time 138: ⛵️ Stop Sailing the Sea of Shiny Shoulds

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