I experienced joy significantly more now than I did then when I was younger. It's partially because like, you can be mournfully in joy. Like this is terrible, but like even in the suffering, there's beauty in that. And it took me a really long time to get there. Or at least it felt like I suffered a lot on that process. The biggest frame shift that I've had in terms of my experience of living has been, "I've learned how to become apathetic"

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