Abby: It's tricky to see that I might have caused a trigger and to not take that as personally because like you said the late it's not as personal it's bringing up some sort of past yeah. The first part of our relationship I I was like I've done something wrong and then I go into a shame spiral, she says. "I didn't figure out for a while that I was also responsible for all the things coming up," Abigail adds.

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