Desires, Serendipity, and Surrender

The author was raised in a devout Methodist home and through early adolescence was involved in religious affairs, giving annual religious talks. From early adolescence until his late twenties, he went through a secular life with marriage, two children, undergraduate school, military service, and then graduate school. Following a near-death experience in the military, he became intent on deeply exploring what was possible to bring understanding to life, to personally experience “enlightenment”, and to end the mental turmoil and suffering he experienced and saw in those around him. One day, reading what turned out to be a famous Zen poem that he had happened upon “by accident”, the normal world fell away and he was in a state never before experienced and beyond any context, he knew. After some time the state passed, but he was left with a burning desire to return to whatever it was that he had experienced. He went deeply into Zen meditation, and then various yogas, first so that he could sit for longer periods and then to work with the body to further inquiry. This process continued for over 25 years through a series of jobs in different industrial companies eventually reaching the senior executive level of a major company with 1000 folk, 4 research laboratories and a budget of $260M; children were raised, went off to college, etc. During this time, there were many experiences and “enlightenments”, but nothing that was lasting, that really touched the core of reality or that ended the suffering brought about by thought. One day, after having consciously surrendered every attachment, and given up completely on being able to reach the final understanding “by his efforts”, doing an asana done thousands of times before, a complete shift in consciousness occurred in which self-referential thought fell away and all that happened, happened in stillness and presence. He realized that he was not this body, nor these thoughts, but the undying consciousness behind them. He saw that everything was perfect as it was and that all was somehow within him, and that simultaneously everything was God. This shift was so complete and radical that he soon left his executive position, did many silent retreats and visits to Zen masters, and yoga teachers in the U.S. and India to confirm and deepen his understanding. To further test his understanding, and to see if it was possible to function successfully from an awakened state, he took other complex, high responsibility, upper-level management positions in fields in which he had no previous experience, and was successful. Since then, he has taught, authored two books, a blog, several articles, numerous videos, interviews, and presentations on nonduality and neuroscience at various conferences and universities. He has been a subject and/or collaborator in cognitive neuroscience and meditation studies at Baumann Institute, IONS, CSNSC, Yale, Johns Hopkins, and Penn State. Books: Happiness Beyond Thought: A Practical Guide to Awakening Dancing Beyond Thought: Bhagavad Gita Verses and Dialogues on Awakening Website: Awakening Beyond Thought Summary and transcript of this interview Interview recorded 7/13/2013 YouTube Video Chapters: 00:00:00 - Introduction and Background 00:05:44 - Pursuing self-inquiry 00:09:37 - The Importance of Practice and Change 00:12:46 - Letting Go of Attachments 00:16:39 - The Presence of Stillness 00:20:41 - Levels of Thought and Mind 00:26:15 - Nipping Thoughts in the Bud 00:30:58 - The Wise Know that I do Nothing at All 00:35:30 - "The Emptiness Dance" and Recognizing the Dance 00:39:21 - Letting Go of Attachments 00:43:33 - Being Present for Others 00:48:31 - The Mistake of the Intellect and Surrendering to the Divine Dance 00:53:38 - The Sweetness of Empty Fullness 00:57:40 - Reconnecting with the Infinite 01:02:14 - The Sweet Space Within Us