Empowered Relationship Podcast: Your Relationship Resource And Guide cover image

ERP 213: How Shame and Grandiosity Relate to Self-esteem: An Interview with Terry Real

Empowered Relationship Podcast: Your Relationship Resource And Guide

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How to Intervene on Your Shame Messages

When someone's plagued with a lot of shame messages, when you've got a big inner critic in this line of negative self-talk, I'm going to give you a muscle to build. You have to do it. This is not thinking about it; this is doing it. It's just like building any other muscle. The first time you try and intervene on your own shame messages, they're going to laugh at you. By the 400th time you do it, they are going to pipe down. So it's a two step process. You block the negative and you create the positive. That violence that I was leveling against myself could have triggered five day depression in me.

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